There are many ways to achieve our goals but ignoring our inner voice is not one of them.
Choices you make define who you are. They’re the building rocks of our life.
Sarcasm-the last refuge of modest people when the privacy of their souls is intrusively invaded
I fear that you will cease to yarn the flight
A leap into the unknown
Chasing the past she stumbled into the future
Nothing less than perfection will do.
Courage is the fragile blossom that grows in the snow
Learn to be what you are and learn to resign with grace all that you are not.
It takes a lot of courage to grow up and be who you really are.
The most exhausting thing in life is being sincere
Sand is overrated
She applies her personality in a paste
“I don’t need nice. I don’t need to be it and I don’t need anybody else to be It at me.”
She can't tell from one moment to the next what she's gonna like
How happy is the blameless?
Change your heart, it will astound you.
We like to communicate. So much we create 7000 facial expressions
44 muscles and 2 bones
Wisdom is knowing the difference between what you can change and what you were born with
Coward is labeling what you don’t want to change as innate
You grow up and out of pureness. you grow out of these feelings and you peel off your expectations just to make room for the higher ones. progress, that is
Never to forget what kissing while crying felt like
It is at dawn that my soul awakens
The power lies in our ability to act upon enthusiasm
Scotched in acceptance
A drop of sun might work
When did enthusiastic become overrated?
Bad time for long-term decisions
"You are a beautiful woman. you deserve a beautiful life"
Jung- "your vision will become clear when you look in your heart. He who looks outside dreams. He who looks inside awakens."
Yet it is in our idleness that the submerged truth comes to the top
It was strange, so much to burn, such colors; it scared me.
sâmbătă, 2 aprilie 2011
friend. best...friend.
you tell me to take care, I'll just turn to the one who will take care of me himself. because he is a true friend.
change. strange.
i wanted to go to the market, i wanted to buy some more time. i wished to purchase my childhood and become its child yet again. i just wanted to remain there, to extend a bit its validity date and remain this way some more. i wanted to buy some more time to be its favorite child.
i went to the market and asked to balance it all: my past, my mistakes, my thoughts, my expectations. i wanted to be able to separate them easily and put them in two bags: "to take" and "to leave". i still want to put them all in balance and be able to move on and focus.I hold one hand to everything behind, i still catch glimpses of everything i used to have, of everyone i used to keep close.
it is hard, moving on. it implies change, it implies leaving behind and digging. it implies digging through memories, dear belongings and, worse, it implies moving away. i will have to move my body away from this cold building i used to call home and my heart apart from them. i have already started to chain it inside, protect her from everything, good or bad. it's become numb, emotions don't ache anymore. for the first time the unknown does not fascinate me, for the very first time i fear this change. i fear taking this train to the unknown, the ticket is way too expensive. it is worth everything i owned these years.
i wanted to buy some more time to hold my brother's hand late in the night, to feel my mother's warm embrace and to wait yet again for this man's timid smile.
i'll go to the supermarket to buy a big wall to place in front of me, to keep this change from happening, to protect my heart from breaking.
i went to the market and asked to balance it all: my past, my mistakes, my thoughts, my expectations. i wanted to be able to separate them easily and put them in two bags: "to take" and "to leave". i still want to put them all in balance and be able to move on and focus.I hold one hand to everything behind, i still catch glimpses of everything i used to have, of everyone i used to keep close.
it is hard, moving on. it implies change, it implies leaving behind and digging. it implies digging through memories, dear belongings and, worse, it implies moving away. i will have to move my body away from this cold building i used to call home and my heart apart from them. i have already started to chain it inside, protect her from everything, good or bad. it's become numb, emotions don't ache anymore. for the first time the unknown does not fascinate me, for the very first time i fear this change. i fear taking this train to the unknown, the ticket is way too expensive. it is worth everything i owned these years.
i wanted to buy some more time to hold my brother's hand late in the night, to feel my mother's warm embrace and to wait yet again for this man's timid smile.
i'll go to the supermarket to buy a big wall to place in front of me, to keep this change from happening, to protect my heart from breaking.
vineri, 1 aprilie 2011
you, my mind.
she said she wanted to be friends again, she's been telling me that for a while and she's been sitting on my mind comfortably sending me mixed signals, all of them heading for the same purpose.
she said she wanted to communicate more with me. she's fed up with all the little dwarfs around her and she started to wish i took her hand and fix it all.
it's for the best that our minds with all its wishes and needs are hid beneath, deep within, protected from all there is, such as mistaken interpretations and misjudged preconceptions. were they ever made public, were they at some point made known, they'd be savagely destroyed, fought with without reason, without exception, by the not-meaning-well, the too-mean ones, just for the sake of proving they think, they have something to say or wishing to do harm. they'd cause pain, without reason, without purpose.
he said i needed love, he said i deserved love, I was worth it, he sent me back to speak with her.
i have always craved for something like it, i wanted it so badly i refused to believe it would ever come true. now i feel it is suffocatingly beautiful and i do not know how to appreciate it or even how to accept it.
i need to talk to her again. i'll ask questions, i'll find answers, i'll question the answers until i can stand sure of these and happy. i have to remember everything that i have ever wished for and i have to be courageous yet again, just as i used to be.
she said she wanted to communicate more with me. she's fed up with all the little dwarfs around her and she started to wish i took her hand and fix it all.
it's for the best that our minds with all its wishes and needs are hid beneath, deep within, protected from all there is, such as mistaken interpretations and misjudged preconceptions. were they ever made public, were they at some point made known, they'd be savagely destroyed, fought with without reason, without exception, by the not-meaning-well, the too-mean ones, just for the sake of proving they think, they have something to say or wishing to do harm. they'd cause pain, without reason, without purpose.
he said i needed love, he said i deserved love, I was worth it, he sent me back to speak with her.
i have always craved for something like it, i wanted it so badly i refused to believe it would ever come true. now i feel it is suffocatingly beautiful and i do not know how to appreciate it or even how to accept it.
i need to talk to her again. i'll ask questions, i'll find answers, i'll question the answers until i can stand sure of these and happy. i have to remember everything that i have ever wished for and i have to be courageous yet again, just as i used to be.
duminică, 6 martie 2011
marți, 1 februarie 2011
inainte de a traversa Europeana. few would know.
imi ingheta sangele in graba lui curganda, dar din suflet zambeam fierbinte. stelele erau multe, cu minte atarnate de cer, dar frigul urla in mine. am zambit fierbinte pana printre dinti a intrat monstrul si am ramas inghetata. am stat inghetata 5 zile intre pereti.
miercuri, 5 ianuarie 2011
terms of endearment.
you insisted to make my day today, just as well. you made my yesterday, you made my today.
in my face! " when the bad moments outweigh the good ones, stop."
in my face! " when the bad moments outweigh the good ones, stop."
luni, 3 ianuarie 2011
welcome, please be seated, stay some more.
"mami, şi eu ce fac acum?"
"exact ce simţi tu că trebuie să faci."
"şi e bine să ţin capul aşa, sus, mândră, ca in poza asta?"
"e perfect firesc, e de aşteptat şi te rog să îl ţii mereu aşa."
"şi în poza asta? cum sunt eu în poza asta?"
"ochii m-ar păcăli, dar nu eşti fericită în poza asta. gura ta mă face atentă. nu eşti fericită aici"
a venit mama acasă, mi-a fost prietenă şi am plănuit cucerirea lumii cum facem noi de obicei.
"exact ce simţi tu că trebuie să faci."
"şi e bine să ţin capul aşa, sus, mândră, ca in poza asta?"
"e perfect firesc, e de aşteptat şi te rog să îl ţii mereu aşa."
"şi în poza asta? cum sunt eu în poza asta?"
"ochii m-ar păcăli, dar nu eşti fericită în poza asta. gura ta mă face atentă. nu eşti fericită aici"
a venit mama acasă, mi-a fost prietenă şi am plănuit cucerirea lumii cum facem noi de obicei.
duminică, 2 ianuarie 2011
o ultimă cădere
ţelul perfecţiunii ne mână spre înălţimi. pe mine întotdeauna. îmi place să nu renunţ, să lupt cu tot ce pot, să merg peste tot cu toată inima. o iau de mână şi o învăţ viaţă.
sâmbătă, 1 ianuarie 2011
tarziu in noapte, definitii, mahmureli.
Poate ca peste niste experiente nu treci niciodata, poate ca niciodata nu termini de analizat si, de ce nu, de inteles. Sau poate nu privesc bine... O prietena buna mi-a spus odata ca ai sa treci prin aceleasi valuri dureros de inspumate de atatea ori cate trebuie pentru a intelege de ce. ma tem de asta, ma ascund de evident de obicei.
Si da, am fost puternica atunci cand a trebuit, am fost mai puternica decat acea ea. De ce insist sa uit asta? Pentru ca am un talent innascut (sper) de a imi deschide o umbrela rosie sub care ma asez, stau un timp, plangandu-mi de mila, gasindu-mi neajunsuri, folosindu-mi imaginatia, mintea toata, prost si nedestept. dar imi trece. repede. spuneam mai sus ca sper pentru ca, de fapt, nu vreau sa recunosc ca am invatat asta de la un anumit cineva.
The power of the mind, asta o sa ma defineasca mereu, clar. Pot sa imi distrug echilibrul, pot sa ma ascund, sa ma victimizez, sa ma chinui, pentru ca stiu de unde sa ma apuc a gandi, stiu pasii urmatori. Asta ma sperie.
E stupid, in alta ordine de idei, a incerca a ma defini ca om, e stupid a spune cine sunt, sa imi dau definitii, sa le demonstrez, asa cum fac cu un sir cand ii aflu la mate limita. Am citit zilele astea undeva cum ca „uneori, daca nu de cele mai multe ori, te cunosti pe tine insuti mai usor daca incerci sa vezi cine si ce nu vrei sa fii.” Da, stiu, in mare, cine nu vreau sa fiu, cum nu vreau sa fiu, ce incerc sa evit a deveni. De aici e simplu. Imi fac reguli, imi impun planuri si ma tin de ele mai rar decat niciodata. De fapt, sunt atat de spontana incat eul meu insusi uimeste neanuntat, brusc si irevocabil, si nu numai pe mine. si am spus-o, am scapat definitia!
Si da, am fost puternica atunci cand a trebuit, am fost mai puternica decat acea ea. De ce insist sa uit asta? Pentru ca am un talent innascut (sper) de a imi deschide o umbrela rosie sub care ma asez, stau un timp, plangandu-mi de mila, gasindu-mi neajunsuri, folosindu-mi imaginatia, mintea toata, prost si nedestept. dar imi trece. repede. spuneam mai sus ca sper pentru ca, de fapt, nu vreau sa recunosc ca am invatat asta de la un anumit cineva.
The power of the mind, asta o sa ma defineasca mereu, clar. Pot sa imi distrug echilibrul, pot sa ma ascund, sa ma victimizez, sa ma chinui, pentru ca stiu de unde sa ma apuc a gandi, stiu pasii urmatori. Asta ma sperie.
E stupid, in alta ordine de idei, a incerca a ma defini ca om, e stupid a spune cine sunt, sa imi dau definitii, sa le demonstrez, asa cum fac cu un sir cand ii aflu la mate limita. Am citit zilele astea undeva cum ca „uneori, daca nu de cele mai multe ori, te cunosti pe tine insuti mai usor daca incerci sa vezi cine si ce nu vrei sa fii.” Da, stiu, in mare, cine nu vreau sa fiu, cum nu vreau sa fiu, ce incerc sa evit a deveni. De aici e simplu. Imi fac reguli, imi impun planuri si ma tin de ele mai rar decat niciodata. De fapt, sunt atat de spontana incat eul meu insusi uimeste neanuntat, brusc si irevocabil, si nu numai pe mine. si am spus-o, am scapat definitia!
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